Waiting on the Keg

I have a very cool Cheers mug that I use so even if my bucket had a hole in it, I could still partake.

Some readers may remember a while back when I wrote on receiving a free half keg of Oatmeal Stout from one of my home state’s finest breweries. Afterwards, I gave up alcohol for Lent and tried to gain some clarity which I definitely found. Just yesterday I got another free keg, this one being a Rye IPA that is easily one of the best beers I have ever tasted and definitely worth the entire afternoon we spent waiting on getting it.

I was on vacation from my new job as as a teacher this week so I took it upon myself to work on the gardens and yard of my home. This lasted for a few days while I listened to more Tame Impala and continued to contemplate dance music when my former boss from my landscaping days called to see if I’d sub in for a few days during my school break to help catch up. I am not a huge fan of the work after doing my own yard for a few days lazily and generally mentally checking out of the last few years of doing this, but I agreed nonetheless. I ended up seeing my friend who brews beer, where we originally got the free keg, and he had this new recipe he came up with himself and he knew I am an IPA enthusiast and would I like to try it? Obviously.

This has long been one of my favorite Stones songs because it’s so different from their other songs. I love the vibe, the saxophone which I think is the jazz great Sonny Rollins and the high notes Jagger hits. One of their best songs of an era that I would not say was their best, the 1980’s.

He told me this at 6:45 am Saturday so I had to go pick it up sometime that night. I had to work all day at the old farm up my road transplanting produce because hippie neighbor number one is extremely lazy and his other employees are not good with the detail work. I spent a very pleasant morning playing with dirt and plants and listening to songs like this on my favorite Saturday morning radio show, The Psychedelic Breakfast. Here was one that had much to do with my work.

Zappa is one of my favorite artists because of the eclectic nature of his music. Plus I mean jeez, check out some of the solos!

The issue was that I had several friends coming over when I got out of work and one had brought a few different types of bourbon which is something I have an affinity for beyond my love of beer. They say beer is proof that God wants us to be happy but I think the Scottish had it right with the word “whisky”, which is supposed to mean the water of life. I digress. It was not going to be an easy wait. I decided that we should all go see a neighbor on my dirt road and shoot some guns to stave off the desire to drink so I’d be able to go pick up my free keg.

When you got a free keg coming but not on your schedule, you have to carry on! Further, as I am trying to learn how to sing, it’s amazing to listen to this band and hear their harmonies. Easily some of the best ever.

I have a lot of guns, growing up in the rural area that I did, so it is always fun for the out-of-staters to go bust off a bunch of shots. I took out a rifle from World War Two-era Russia and a buddy brought some pistols and we spent a few hours blowing up milk jugs full of water and scaring the local wildlife in a sandpit. This kept our minds off of the booze and so it wasn’t until we shot all of our ammo that the waiting really began.

The Kinks really never do get old and I could probably write a book about them. I guess a future post will have to do. This was a mainstay of the cool oldies station I listened to with my Dad and what a great song!

We picked up our casings and headed back to my house where my friends decided to get into the bourbon while we waited to get the call for the keg. And waited. And waited and…you get the point.  All of our talk turned to when we were going to get this keg. The more drunk my friends got, the more agitated they got with me and my lack of knowledge of when we actually are going to be able to use and see this keg. I didn’t want to harrass my brewer friend because I could see how this beer exchange, or gifting really, could really have positive long term effects for me. Their jeers became more hurtful, saying things like “I’d pay for this fucking keg if we ever see it in real life, who cares if it’s free?” My patience was low.

You can’t ever go wrong with this song when you are seeking patience. I love the last verse so much and whenever I try to tell someone to have patience, I just starting singing this song. My Axel is not great but passes.

Approaching 8 pm, after my college friends were getting pretty wasted and I was about to mix a whiskey rocks myself, I finally got the call to go get the keg. I had to bring two drunk friends who wanted to meet the brewer who was luckily very calm at this point and happy to tell us all about his beer. It’s his own recipe and it is sort of a summer style IPA in that it has this type of hops called Citra along with the rye and other sort of typical IPA ingredients. So, it”s incredibly drinkable and also potent, an amazing but dangerous mix perfect my friends and I.  He deftly told my drunk college friends about the process and told me I could get a pony keg basically whenever I tapped mine out. This is good news.

This is a bad-ass song that is supposed to signify my celebration of a quality source of free beer. I may not have all of the luck, but sometimes good things to happen to generally good people. Yes, I also love Led Zeppelin.

I do love beer and no one likes waiting. Is there some deeper moral here besides having patience, don’t drink and shoot guns, and don’t look a gift horse in the mouth? Probably not but I do hope the Elder J can consume some free beer with me sometime and that I actually have it when he comes to visit our home state. Cheers!

14 comments on “Waiting on the Keg

  1. theelderj says:

    This story kind of reminds me of the second scene in “Infinite Jest” where the guy waits for the delivery and undergoes step after step of paranoia, hope and disappointment…

  2. professormortis says:

    My Baroness adores “Waiting on a Friend”. We played it during our wedding reception. Great choice!

    Also, I forgot you have that Nagant. I need to shoot that thing.

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